You listen in a way that communicates understanding. You have good boundaries - you realize that this is their experience and not yours. You are in touch with your own feeling capacities. What builds connection is entering into another person’s reality, validating it and treating it with respect - in a word, empathy.Įmpathy is the ability to enter into another person’s experience and connect with it in such a way that you actually experience it in some degree. When you truly connect with people you release an energy that fuels drive, passion and accomplishment. People know when you are detached versus when you are connected, that is, invested in them. 
Trust is built when people feel that you have a genuine interest in knowing them, knowing about them, and believing that what they know matters.
The first of these traits is the ability to establish trust.
In the ongoing book summary of Integrity by Henry Cloud he lists six characteristics essential to being a person of character, that is, to be able to meet the demands of reality.
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